Fourth Of July Family Time and Epic Sister Fights
I don’t know about you guys, but when my family gets together it’s insanity. I have huge extended families on both sides and we all get along and love getting together. One of the hardest parts about living in New York is being so far away from my West Coast family! Today my sister and I are flying to Cincinnati to celebrate the Fourth of July. My sister and I get into a huge insane fight anytime we go anywhere. More on that later. But I LOVE traveling. I could go anywhere on the turn of a dime, just give me 5 minutes to pack a bag or hell I can buy clothes when I get there! Traveling when you’re training for a marathon is really tough, ESPECIALLY when you’re traveling over a holiday weekend. Why you ask? Because holidays=delicious food & alcohol. Ever had to run 15 miles after a day of drinking and barbequing? It’s not fun and it’s not pretty.
I was looking at my training plan and trying to figure out just what I was going to do. Do I actually want to spend Sunday morning running my scheduled 14 miler? Not really. But I can’t afford to cut back this weekend because I had a rest week 2 weeks ago. I thought well what if I just up the intensity of my runs this week and then return to my long runs next weekend? And then I was all DAMNIT! Next weekend I am going to be in the Poconos. (What’s a Pocono? I have no clue but someone told me zip lining, lakes, bunk beds, and drinking were involved and I was all WHEN DO WE LEAVE?!) So I HIGHLY doubt I am going to be running 15 miles up a mountain next weekend, unless I want to be bear bait, so what do I do? Well I am going to drink beer, close my eyes, and pretend I am not slacking. JUST KIDDING….Kind of…
Here’s my plan. This week/weekend I am going to take it easy and do my normal 5-7 mile runs with intervals spread throughout. Then Tuesday I am going to do 14 miles after work. THIS WAY I can do my 15 miles the Monday I get back from the Poconos. See, with a little brain work it all comes together. AND you will be happy to know that I packed very lightly. Only a backpack and a carry on! I am killing it today. I woke up early and did some hill repeats before work, fit everything into 2 bags, got to work early and now here I am just slaying my Wednesday. I’m feeling real god on this Fourth of July Eve Eve.
AND THEN trouble walks in. I don’t know if you guys know this but my sister and I work together. If you ever wondered what it’s like to work with your sister, it is the greatest. When I first moved to New York we shared her 5x10 hole in the wall of a room for 3 months! You could literally touch the walls when you put your arms out. So we are close. We also LOVE to fight. We fight at work all the time. It’s hilarious and incredibly unprofessional. We ask people to take sides or to give messages to one another. But I love her and even when we fight; it’s entertaining because it’s funny.
So Sammy (my sister) walks into to work today and gives me her typical I’m annoyed with you glare. And I go “WHAT DID I DO?” And she’s all “You stole my carry on.” Semi-accurate, I did. I didn’t technically steal it though; I just happened to have used it last and took it home so I could use it again. AND neither of us know where said carry on came from so it’s not even hers, she just happened to have acquired it when we went home for Christmas. So technically it’s the universes’ and we are sharing it.
Whenever Sam and I travel together we get into a HUGE fight. In the past 2 years there have been 4 really fantastic huge and dirty fights.
4. She recently un-followed me on Instagram.
3. She kicked me out of her 5x10 room. (This is why I moved to Brooklyn.)
2. She cussed me out in the terminal because I wanted to use the car to get my haircut and she wanted the car to go to breakfast with a friend. (My mom was rolling on the floor laughing and my father was mortified.)
1. She took her shirt (Well technically it was my shirt) off on a plane because she wanted the window seat.
Let’s relive battle story #1 shall we? It’s really good! Sit down and grab some popcorn! Well, this was way back in 2012, back when both my sister and I were west coasters finishing our final years of college. We were flying to Cincinnati for my cousin Kate’s wedding. Our seat assignments were the window seat and the middle seat. Sitting in the airport I suggested we kill some time and grab a drink. I had a delicious beer and Sammy had a classy glass of Red Wine. We were joking and having a swell time until I asked, “Who gets the window seat?” Sammy originally tried to the play the “Well I am assigned to it, so I get it” card. And I’m all, "Hell to the no, that’s not fair that I have to sit in the middle twice. Why don’t you sit one way and I will sit the other.” Sammy, being a wicked and conniving woman, knew we were flying back to LA on HER BIRTHDAY and thought to herself, “I can play the birthday card and get the window seat twice.” She doesn’t tell me this but instead says, “I’ll take it on the way there and you can have it on the way back.” I say, “Ok, but you can only have it on the way there if you promise not to get up to go to the bathroom; I plan on sleeping the entire time. And if you have it on the way there, that means you will be sitting in the middle seat on your birthday.” She says, “That's fine!” And we board the plane.
Once seated I took a melatonin to help me sleep. Sammy goes, “Can I have one?” I say, “Most definitely.” She asks, “Wait will this make me sick? I had that glass of red wine.” I say, “I take it after having beer or wine all the time and I’ve never gotten sick.” She takes it and we both go to bed. WELL, we are about to begin our descent into Atlanta, where we had a connecting flight, when Samantha starts VISCIOUSLY shaking me awake. She goes, “MOVE I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.” I say, “NO WAY JOSE, WE HAD A DEAL!” She goes, “IM GOING TO THROW UP!” The woman seated on the aisle leaps out of her seat and Sammy climbs over me and runs dramatically down the aisle to the bathroom. I of course, start laughing hysterically because that’s what I do when I am uncomfortable. I was also swimming in a post red eye sleep haze. She comes back and is very angry that I can’t stop laughing. The first punch had been thrown.
Fast forward to October 30 2012, the day of our departure. On our return flight we were accompanied by our Uncle Bob (Who is a sport’s psychologist so I often go “Uncle Bob you’re a professional, tell Sammy she’s a psychopath.”), my cousin Matthew, and my cousin Becca. The fight began that morning at brunch. Sam slyly drops that I should let her sit in the window seat because it’s her birthday. To which I am like, FAT CHANCE! And she turns to everyone at the table, all 30 of them, and announces, “KELLY WON’T LET ME HAVE THE WINDOW SEAT! AND IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!” To which I stand up and say, “No way! We had a deal! Sam got it on the way here and I got it on the way back! I told her when we agreed that she would be sitting in the middle on her birthday and she agreed. NOT TODAY WISE GUY!” And everyone goes, “Good try Sam but you made a deal. You get the middle.” Sam’s angry. So a few hours later, we get to the airport. We got split up in security. My Uncle Bob, cousin Becca and sister went ahead and Matt and I were in a different line. Matt and I were taking our sweet time, completely oblivious to the fact that we were running late and going to miss the plane. A guy in a golf cart rolls up to us and goes “Are you Matt Corb and Kelly Roberts” and we are all “YES! YES WE ARE! Did we win something?” And the golf cart man says, “No they are about to close the door to your plane, I was sent to find you.” So we get escorted to the gate and I see Samantha, my Uncle Bob and cousin Becca walking up to the gate. So I take off running knowing full well that Samantha intended to swoop the window seat. She sees me coming and takes off. I cut her off and bolt down the aisle and sit down in the window seat. She screams, “LET ME HAVE THE WINDOW, IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!” (Mind you this was a completely sold out flight full of people who were waiting on us to board.) I scream back, “WE MADE A DEAL!” Some woman in the back of the plane goes, “Let her have the window it’s her birthday.” I scream to the stranger, “STAY OUT OF THIS!” Sam goes into full on attack mode screaming at me how I’m an awful and terrible sister. She turns to the poor man on the aisle and goes, “Buckle up, it’s gonna be a long flight buddy” and continues to call me selfish. I go, “If I’m so selfish why would I let you wear my shirt!” She goes, “I don’t want to wear your shirt anyways!” STANDS UP, TAKES OFF MY SHIRT, AND SITS BACK DOWN IN ONLY HER BRA. And then we sat in fuming silence the rest of the flight.
I don’t know what it is but we’ve never traveled without having a huge giant fight! I mean, even when one of us goes away we still manage to fight! (Granted the last one I was acting like a crazy person, but at least I was acknowledging it! I was texting, “IM OVER-REACTING AND IM ANGRY. YOU HURT MY FEELINGS GO AWAY OR I WILL CONTINUE TO OVER-REACT AND SAY AWFUL THINGS TO YOU!”) Maybe this will be the first trip we don’t fight! Place your bets people, place your bets. I’m calling Sam going full psycho on Sunday AND I CAN’T WAIT! I love my sister so much when she goes full psycho. It’s very entertaining.
Alright everyone, if you’re traveling this summer and need some guidance on where to work out, here’s some groovy resources.
http://www.walkjogrun.net/ helps you plan running routes when you don’t know the area.
http://athleticmindedtraveler.com/ helps you find running route, running groups, fitness clubs, hotels with great fitness centers and local eateries.
I’ll keep you posted on how tonight goes! It’s only been an hour and we’ve already argued over a carry on and the fact that she didn’t bring her bags to work. HAPPY FOURTH OF JEWLIE EVE EVE EVERYONE! Until tomorrow, when I’ll be coming at you from Ohio, #RunSelfieRepeat.